Dear Gay Best Friend,
In August of 2011, I went to a club with my girlfriends and as the night progressed my eyes locked eyes with this guy across the dance floor. We spoke and exchanged numbers and I also noticed he had a thick accent. So, I asked how long he was in Jamaica for and he said he was leaving the Sunday (it was Wednesday). His friends and my friends spent the rest of our time in the club dancing and enjoying the music.
The following day he invited me to dinner and I learned a little about his background and that he is also Jamaican but he migrated at a young age. He said he was 40-years old (8 years my senior), single and have no kids and he lives alone. He asked if I could spend the rest of his time in Jamaica with him and I said no because I had previous plans (trip to the country to visit my friend’s grandmother who was not doing so well health wise). On the way home he gave me his contact info for the states (work address and home address and numbers) and he promised to stay in touch.
We communicated every day by phone and bbm until October 2011 when he came out to surprise me at my office. I was so happy because I was beginning to like him and he seemed more mature and conscious in his thinking. We spent a week together and he went home, and my issue now is that he met me single and I haven’t been with anyone since meeting him in August. He had said he is not really the texting type, but he will talk on the phone but sometimes I would text in the morning and he would not answer until later that night. He works in construction and I get that the job can be hectic, and when he gets home he falls asleep, but the conversations have gotten less frequent. He has gone a weekend without saying anything and resurfaced saying he went to a funeral and his phone had no signal on it.
Otherwise from that, he has been there when I needed a listening ear. He calls and asks about my mom. He asked how things are in Jamaica, and he shows concern about me in general, but he just seems so distant. I know long distant relationships are the work of the devil. I don’t know if he will be coming back to Jamaica, but do you think I’m reading too much into his actions? – Island Girl Left Afloat
Dear Ms. Island Girl Left Afloat,
Girl, that man was looking for a fling while he was on vacation. He was not looking for a relationship, a girlfriend, or a wife. He wanted to have a good time, and he saw you as a good time piece of ass. Honey, I hope you know that when folks go out of the country, especially to exotic locales and Caribbean Islands, they are not there for love. They are there for sex, parties, and good times. It’s just like going to Vegas – whatever happens there, stays there. He wanted to get in your pants and have you freak his lights out. LMBAO!
But, let’s explore this. There’s one of two things going on with that man. Either he has a slew of women at his disposal and you are just another girl he’s ready to add to the mix. Or, he’s gay/down low and he’s just not that into you.